Be the Church that Embraces Children, Not Just Tolerates Them

The following article was written by the president of Church Answers, Sam Rainer and was posted on the Church Answers blog during this past week.

Sam is the lead pastor of West Bradenton Baptist Church and is the co-host of the Est.Church podcast.

He has also co-founded Rainer Publishing and serves as the president of the Revitalize Network.

There are two kinds of churches—those that embrace children and those that tolerate children. Most churches are not rude towards kids, and I’ve never seen a church sign stating “No Kids Allowed.” However, the families visiting your church will know whether you embrace their kids or not. The churches that welcome children have a higher likelihood of families returning—not just once but often!

Embracing children means understanding that messy is healthy.
Children do not learn to eat cleanly. They turn dining room tables into abstract impressionist works. More food ends up in the hair than in the mouth. You’ll need a hazmat suit to serve spaghetti. Children learning to take in God’s Word, worship, and love Jesus are just as messy. The dirt line on church walls about two feet high is there because little hands are dragging as kids walk the halls. Messy is healthy.

Embracing children means valuing noise over perfection.
Children make noises in worship. Children make noises in classes. Children make noises in the parking lot. They cry. They laugh loud. They scream and yell. Some churches tolerate the noise. Other churches value the noise. I’ve heard of churches not allowing children below a certain age in the worship service. It’s ridiculous.

Embracing children means protection at all costs.
Child security is a discipleship issue—and one of the most important! If you believe in the Great Commission, you will create robust security measures for children. Jesus says, “I am with you always.” A low-security church teaches children, “I am with you sometimes.”

Embracing children means consistent promotion in multiple venues.
Check your worship guide. What is in there about children? Check your social media feeds, email newsletters, and worship service announcements. If kids are not there, then you are not embracing children.

Embracing children means investing in Children’s Ministry.
Is your children’s minister the lowest-paid ministry team member? Does your children’s budget match your worship budget? A church that embraces children will invest in the ministries supporting children. A church that tolerates children will give the monetary leftovers to them. If it is easier to cut your children’s budget than your technology budget, then you likely are not embracing children in your church.

Embracing children means understanding church at their level.
A lot of churches will seek out the perspective of parents. You should! Helping parents create God-centered homes, not child-centered homes, is one of the core elements of family discipleship. However, you should not neglect the perspective of a child. Ask about their experiences, their feelings, and their opinions. When you understand church at a child’s level, you are better positioned to guide the child towards Christ.

In Luke 18:16, Jesus invited the children. “[He] called the children to him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.”” (New International Version)

In Mark 10:13-16, Jesus embraced the children. “People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them.” (New International Version) 

Churches that welcome and embrace children are like Jesus. Jesus becomes angry at the disciples for discounting the value of children. The next time a child cries out in church, don’t get angry at the child. Instead, get angry at the person who is angry at the child. Children are a blessing, so churches should make them a priority. Be the church that embraces children, not just tolerates them.

The above article has been adapted from Sam’s book, The Church Revitalization Checklist: A Hopeful and Practical Guide for Leading Your Congregation to a Brighter Tomorrow.

This book is a tool to help you start afresh, leverage your strengths, and discover hidden opportunities for church growth; providing a step-by-step path to a hope-filled future for both you and your church.

Sam will walk us through a seven-point checklist – everything from reconsidering your priorities to evaluating your location and facilities. It is an extremely practical tool to unleash your congregation and help them step into God’s unique purpose for them.

The book is available through any good Christian bookstore, Amazon, and Tyndale House Publishers. 

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